66

No matter who no matter what condition, age, or

sex,

But some 'get shot,' and some 'get drown'd,' and some 'get' broken necks;

Some get run over' by a coach ;—and one beyond the

seas

Got' scraped to death with oyster-shells among the Caribbees!

"Those Masons three, who set her free, fell first!—it is

averred

That two were hang'd on Tyburn tree for murdering of the

third:

*

Charles Storey, too, his friend who slew, had ne'er, if truth they tell,

Been gibbeted on Chartham Downs, had they not met with Nell!

"Then send me not, mine Uncle dear, oh! send me not, I

pray,

Back through that Entry dark to-night, but round some other way!

I will not be a truant boy, but good, and mind my book, For Heaven forfend that ever I foregather with Nell

Cook !

*

* In or about the year 1780, a worthy of this name cut the throat of a journeyman paper-maker, was executed on Oaten Hill, and afterwards hung in chains near the scene of his crime. It was to this place, as being the extreme boundary of the City's jurisdiction, that the worthy Mayor with so much naïveté wished to escort Archbishop M*** on one of his progresses, when he begged to have the honour of "attending his Grace as far as the gallows."

The class was call'd at morning tide, and Master Tom was

there;

He look'd askew, and did eschew both stool, and bench, and

chair.

He did not talk, he did not walk, the tear was in his

eye,

He had not e'en that sad resource, to sit him down and

cry.

Hence little boys may learn, when they from school go out

to dine,

They should not deal in rigmarole, but still be back by

nine;

For if when they've their great-coat on, they pause before

they part

To tell a long and prosy tale,-perchance their own may smart!

MORAL.

-A few remarks to learned Clerks in country and in town

Don't keep a pretty serving-maid though clad in russet

brown!

Don't let your Niece sing" Bobbing Joan!"-don't with a

merry eye,

Hob-nob in Sack and Malvoisie,- and don't eat too much

pie !!

And oh beware that Entry dark,-especially at night,And don't go there with Jenny Smith all by the pale moonlight!

So bless the Queen and her Royal Weans,-and the Prince whose hand she took,

And bless us all, both great and small,—and keep us from Nell Cook!

KIND, good-hearted, gouty Uncle John! how well I remember all the kindness and affection which my mischievous propensities so ill repaid his bright blue coat and resplendent gilt buttons-his "frosty pow" si bien poudré-his little quill-like pigtail!—Of all my praiseworthy actions-they were "like angel visits, few and far between"-the never-failing and munificent rewarder; of my naughty deeds-they were multitudinous as the sands on the sea-shorethe ever-ready palliator; my intercessor, and sometimes even my defender against punishment, "staying harsh justice in its mid career!"-Poor Uncle John! he will ever rank among the dearest of my